’Hoo’s Your UVA Bestie?
We asked about your cherished friendships from UVA and you delivered. Random connections. Shared interests. Housing decisions gone completely right. Enjoy this expanded Time Capsule, with additional entries that we couldn’t fit in print.
Parallel lives merge
Jordan Lasker (Col class of ’14) and Julia Monahan (Com class of ’14) met when they were randomly assigned to the same first-year Courtenay suite, but they joke that they led parallel lives up to that point. Both grew up in Fredericksburg. They played field hockey directly against each other—left wing and right back. They shared a stage in all-county band. And they even attended the same preschool. “We lived together all through college, and then eight years later we were roommates again,” Lasker shares. “We are so grateful to UVA for bringing us together!”
Constant contact
In the fall of 1989, Laurie Howard Felton (Col class of ’92) moved into the Rogers portal at Brown College and met Anh Chau (Col class of ’92) and Jessica Jamieson (Col class of ’92). “They were roommates on the other side of the bathroom we shared [for the next three years], but we were in each other’s rooms constantly,” Felton remembers. “Despite living in different parts of the country, we’ve traveled together over the years and try to visit each other as often as we can. Every morning, we group chat a quick hello to start the day, and recently we spent the weekend together enjoying the fall weather in northern New Jersey and Central Park. These two women are among the most important people in my life.”
Metcalf roomies
“I don’t know what magic criteria they use to pick first-year roommates, but nearly 20 years after we were selected to share a room in Metcalf dorm, my roommate is still one of my dearest friends,” Elizabeth Woodley (Col class of ’09, Law class of ’12) shares about her bestie Cory Wood Clanahan (Com class of ’09). “We stayed roommates on Grounds and off for five years, I was her bridesmaid, and I know we would drop everything to help each other if one of us needed it. I often visit her family at their house not far from Charlottesville, and sometimes we walk around Grounds to reminisce and see everything that’s changed!”
City girls connect
Jasmine Drake (Col class of ’13) spied Jazzirelle Hill (Col class of ’12) at a Latino Student Alliance event in the Amphitheatre.
“I went up to her because she was wearing Jordans, and I assumed she grew up in an urban area. And I was right because she is a city girl just like me,” Drake says. “Ever since then we have been close. I was the bridesmaid at her wedding [when] she married William Hill (Col class of ’12, Grad class of ’15). I’m happy to call her my UVA bestie.”
Sticking together
Noah Kaufman (Com class of ’99), Matt Moore (Col class of ’98) and Neil Berkowitz (Col class of ’99) met nearly three decades ago while attending an event with fellow Hillel members. Within weeks, they’d become close friends. “Over the next three decades, we remained in each other’s lives, all were best men at our weddings, talking on the phone often, attending birthday parties (in person and on Zoom), etc., even though we no longer lived in the same area,” shares Kaufman, who visited with Berkowitz and his parents at Thanksgiving. “I am grateful for their help over some challenging recent years, calling to see how I am doing and providing helpful advice, or just listening.”
Forever friends
Lynne Berkness (Col class of ’82) and Mary Dean Scott met on the first day of classes in the fall of 1978. They were both first-year engineering students and had nearly every class together. “It was just a natural next step that we would become friends,” Berkness remembers. “To this day, she is the best friend I have ever had.”
At UVA, they drank plenty of Tab and Budweiser and shared their hopes and dreams, clothing and jewelry, heartbreaks and tears, Berkness writes. “We laughed so hard that it just plain hurt sometimes. We went on a ton of double dates, and I don’t think we ever cared if the guys knew each other or not.”
“We sang a LOT (usually quite loudly and honestly not too well) but we didn’t care,” Berkness remembers. “We loved Diana Ross (probably knew all the words to every song) and we rarely missed a Skip Castro Monday night at the Mineshaft.”
The two lived together second year, third year and fourth year. They had great plans for post-graduation—maybe move to Houston and continue their grand adventure, Berkness writes. “We didn’t think anything could stop us.”
But then, in November 1981, Scott was killed in a car accident. “It was devastating,” Berkness writes.
Berkness never made it to Houston. She moved back to Richmond, Virginia, married, and raised two children. But she’s remained connected to the Scott family, traveling regularly to Charlottesville to check in with them.
“They are such blessings in my life,” she says. “We have been a bittersweet balm of comfort for each other for over 40 years.”
She keeps Mary Dean close to her, keeping a picture of her on her desk. “It reminds me of youth, innocence, joy and just pure friendship.”
In 2024, Berkness had the chance to see Diana Ross in concert. To her delight, her husband made her a pin with that treasured picture of Scott so she could wear it to the event. “Mary Dean went with me and was literally right next to my heart the entire evening! … I felt Mary Dean right there with me—and I truly know she was.”
Random conversation
Tiffany Williams (Col class of ’04) and Christina Parrish (Col class of ’04) began their friendship in the fall of 2002 while taking a Constitutional Interpretation class. “We struck up a random conversation after class one day, never imagining the role we’d play in each other’s lives over the next 20-plus years. We’ve been by each other’s side through some of life’s highest highs and lowest lows since that day,” Williams shares. “Nowadays, we consider each other family.”
Their decades-long friendship has included, in just the past couple of years, vacations in the Caribbean, taking lessons on the golf course, Broadway plays in New York, church, and hanging out at each other’s homes. Williams is godmother to Parrish’s daughters, and she’s also attended their swim meets and orchestra concerts.
“On one of my first days on Grounds during first year, I was told that some of the most impactful things that would happen during my time at UVA wouldn’t come from a lecture,” Williams writes. “Never has this been proven more true than in my enduring friendship with Christina.”
Photo redo
“Some of my besties were in my dorm, Emmet third right,” shares Elizabeth J. Green (Col class of ’81). “We finally had a mini reunion in 2019 and re-created a picture most of us were in in 1982.”
Middle: Elizabeth J. Green (Col class of ’81), Leslie Diana News (Arch class of ’81) and Ellen A. Murnane (Col class of ’81, Educ class of ’83); Front: Sharon Lee Hurt (Col class of ’81) and Sandy Rumsey-Merrill (Arch class of ’81)
A bigmouth and a nerd
“My first minute in my dorm room, this nerdy guy came in and started telling me how to arrange my room,” Michael Ridenhour (Col class of ’71, Educ class of ’73) said of Chad Young (Col class of ’67, Law class of ’74). “I was outraged by this nut. Within a few weeks, we were both ostracized from the other guys (I was a bigmouth and he a nerd). So we decided we should form an alliance and be friends, 61 years ago. He lives three hours away now, but still my best friend.”
62 years
“The bulk of our AEPi Fraternity Pledge Class from 1962 has remained in close contact for 62 years,” Charles Lorber (Com class of ’66) shares. “Since the invention of Zoom, we have as many as 11 on our weekly Friday call. We travel together (most recently spending a week at Virginia Beach), we go to football games once a year … and we manage to make a few basketball games. The good news is that our wives get along! As we reach 80 this year, there have been a few birthday parties as well.”
All the way to Oz
“Even across continents, Ray Quirolgico (Col class of ’91), Melanie Adams (Col class of ’91) and I are still in daily communication 30-plus years on,” Tim Pence (Com class of ’91) shares. “In fact, I would say that our bonds have grown stronger over the years. It helped that we all went to grad school together after UVA and then all took jobs near each other on the West Coast afterward. While I’ve been out of the physical scene in Australia, aka Oz, for the last 28 years, Melanie and Ray worked together in St. Louis for years. And they even surprised me by coming to see me in Alaska when I was sent there for work! 30-plus years on, we’re still finishing each other’s sentences. :-)”
Together again
Debbie Robinson Minneman (Nurs class of ’79) met Gale Wyatt Groseclose (Nurs class of ’79) on her first day at UVA. Groseclose’s room was next to Minneman’s in Webb, and they became instant friends. “Near the end of first year while we were both in the College, I asked Gale what she was going to major in. I had no idea what to do,” Minneman shares. “She immediately responded she had always wanted to be a nurse. I found out I had taken many prerequisites already and said, ‘Sounds good to me. I guess I’ll do that too.’ Forty-five years this past June, I retired from a very fulfilling nursing career. I owe it to Gale.”
The two lived together for the rest of their time at UVA. After graduation, they moved to Charlotte, North Carolina, for nursing jobs and were in each other’s weddings. Minneman eventually moved to Minneapolis, but they stayed in touch with long phone calls every few months.
In 1999, they began attending UVA reunions together, including their 45th reunion in June. “They are beyond fun,” Minneman shares. “What a dance party on Saturday night!”
In 2016, Minneman moved back to Charlotte. The friends from Webb now live three miles apart. “We see each other weekly and still have so much fun together,” Minneman says. “A random room assignment in 1975 next door to Gale changed my entire life.”
Abiding friendships
Seven first-years met in the fall of 1992 in the Maupin dorm and began nurturing what have become lifelong connections. The seven lived together in various combinations throughout their UVA years, and during their fourth year they rented three cottages with a shared yard, Kate Winslow (Col class of ’96) writes.
Since their UVA days, Winslow, Kendall Doerr Jaffe (Arch class of ’96), Connie Yun (Col class of ’96), Tracy Ward (Col class of ’96), Laura Larimer (Col class of ’96), Vienna Wilson (Col class of ’96) and Christina Wulf (Col class of ’96) have scattered across the country. But they’ve made time to reunite and to support one another at weddings and births, Winslow shares.
During the pandemic, they began coming together virtually, and since March 2020, they’ve met every Sunday afternoon. “It has been the greatest gift to be in one another’s lives on a weekly basis again, so that conversations can be both mundane and deep,” Winslow shares.
Those abiding friendships provided comfort during a particularly difficult time for the friends. Doerr Jaffe was diagnosed with liver cancer in January 2024 and died on Thanksgiving Day.
“In early November, we learned that she had very little time left, and we were all able to get out to San Francisco to see her and spend a few days together,” Winslow says. “It has been devastating, but she lived her life so beautifully, down to the very end. … It was such a joy we could all be together for Kendall and for ourselves. Thirty-two years of friendship means so much.”
A lifetime of friendship
Of all the alumni who answered our Time Capsule question, just one pair of friends both submitted entries: Dave Firth (Engr class of ’72) and Bill Roderick (Engr class of ’72). In September 1967, the first-years met while standing in line at Maury Hall to get their NROTC uniforms. “Dave is never short of words, so he just started talking,” Roderick remembers. “By the time we got out of there, I think we were friends.” Beyond NROTC, the two had plenty in common. They were both engineering students and big sports fans and had both spent their childhoods moving around.
“We hit it off right away,” Roderick says. They built on that friendship over the next five years at UVA. And after graduation, they both went into the nuclear submarine force. At one point, Roderick and his wife were stationed in Charleston, South Carolina, when Firth’s boat pulled in. Firth called Roderick to see if he was free. Roderick and his wife sent their dinner guest home and went to pick him up.
“That’s the kind of relationship and friendship that we had, that we would drop anything for either one of us,” Firth says.
They both left the Navy and began to build their lives—Roderick in Ohio and Firth in Virginia. But they’ve kept in touch. Every year for 50 years, they’ve attended a UVA football game together. The couples meet at the Rodericks’ home in the summer and in Florida in the winter, and FaceTime regularly.
“I think of it as family,” Firth says of the long friendship. “When you get to choose your family, it’s much more special.”
Says Roderick: “I don’t know what it was about that first meeting, but I really feel like when we walked out of that ROTC building, that we were friends, and I think we were pretty inseparable after that. … We were just really good friends from the very first minute, and that’s not something you want to let go.”
Fast friends
Halima Walker (Col class of ’14) and Kyrsten Hughes (Col class of ’11) were first-years living in Malone at Hereford Residential College when they quickly became friends. They’ve grown closer with each year and are now both cardiovascular critical care nurses who support each other through life milestones, Walker shares.
“Having your college bestie still be a part of your life is a blessing, and I am so happy that we can still laugh about our times [at UVA] while we navigate adulthood together. I could not ask for a better friend.”
‘Ubiquitous in my life’
Gene Childs (Col class of ’74, Darden class of ’80) and John Gersuk (Col class of ’74) met as pledge brothers and began bonding in 1970 while dateless and dancing on the radiators of the Chi Psi fraternity during first-year parties. “It was a great place to see the band, and then you just naturally started dancing up there,” Childs says.
In the more than 50 years since, they’ve crossed oceans and continents to reunite, usually with their families.
“I was at one of the Gersuk girls’ weddings in Denver and, at some point during the reception, one of them looked at me and said, ‘Oh my God, they even wear the same shoes,’” Childs says. (They both prefer an L.L. Bean moccasin.)
Though separated by distance, they text, often daily. “It’s one of those funny things where regardless of how long it’s been or whether we’ve texted recently, it doesn’t take much to trigger random thoughts of Gene,” Gersuk says. “A painting, book, piece of music, whatever … he’s ubiquitous in my life.”
Same beat
“Thank you to the Cavalier Marching Band for some of my dearest and best friends from the horn section!” writes Kelly Graham (Col class of ’13). “Since graduation, we have traveled together, celebrated each other through achievements, weddings, babies, etc., and regularly stay in touch even though we are scattered across the country. #waHORNwa!”
DragonCon
“Every year, members of our UVA crew reunite at DragonCon—a massive celebration of pop culture, sci-fi, fantasy, and fandoms from all corners of the universe,” writes Bruce H. Russell II (Col class of ’97). That crew often includes Russell, along with Jason Johnson (Col class of ’97), Dan Walmsley (Com class of ’97), Josh Barney (Col class of ’97) and Joyce Kilgore (Col class of ’95).
“It’s a tradition that keeps us connected to our roots,” Russell shares. “We met in the Tuttle TV lounge, gathering to watch new episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation and Deep Space Nine back in the day, forming friendships over late-night discussions and shared excitement for what came next. Now DragonCon has become our annual ritual to honor those early days.”
Making life richer
“I met my great friend James Fukuda (Col class of ’07) in our suite first year. (New Dorms, Dobie 140s, D-Block!) We bonded over our love of sports, video games and food while playing pickup games at Slaughter/AFC all year long,” shares Stephen Davis (Col class of ’07). “We were apartment-mates at U-Heights for second, third and fourth year as well. He’s one of the reasons I studied Japanese at UVA, and I was able to visit Japan for the first time after graduation (my first time out of the country at that) with him due to his family’s generosity.”
Their circle grew wider in third and fourth year to include apartment-mates Brandon Johnson (Educ class of ’08) and Alex Wu (Com class of ’07). Since graduation, they’ve made time to take trips whenever they can. “Though it’s been over 15 years since I graduated, I consider these guys some of my closest friends and know that they would be there if I ever needed anything,” Davis writes.
Orientation week beginnings
Melissa “Missy” Lockman MacDonald (Col class of ’90) and Cameron Costa Donohue (Col class of ’90) met before classes started during ROTC Orientation Week in 1987, Donohue shares. They were two of only three women in the new NROTC class of midshipmen that year. After recognizing each other on a Friday night in a swarm of first-years at a bus stop three weeks into the school year, they quickly became best friends and have been since, Donohue shares.
“We’ve been in each other’s weddings and visit at least once a year. She was even in my family’s holiday photo shoot one year! And, of course, I hosted her for the 2019 NCAA men’s basketball tournament in my home city!”
Instant friends
“Eva Keller Carson (Col class of ’81) and I met on the Lawn in May 1978. Each of us were with two other friends and were vying for a large share house on Carrollton Terrace. Wisely, our two groups merged, and the six of us moved in that summer of our third year,” Deborah Gilbert Apel (Col class of ’82) writes. “After two years of struggling to find meaningful friendships, Eva and I instantly bonded, sharing a love of the outdoors, music and our university while also sharing great times together with a fairly extensive group of friends. We ran together, hitchhiked together, danced together and studied together.”
‘Sister I never had’
“In the fall of 1964, I met Katie Mason (Col class of ’65), my UVA bestie, in Mary Munford Hall,” shares Dorothy Bundy Potter (Grad class of ’66, class of ’00). “We were both history majors, in a small minority of women graduate students. I was later one of her bridesmaids. Though we live more than six hours apart, when we get together we still finish each other’s sentences. She is the sister I never had.”
Soap fans
Wendy Browning-Lynch (Com class of ’96) and Emily Tankersley Yancey (Com class of ’95) met watching As the World Turns in the old dorms in the fall of 1991, and they spent the next several years having fun together at parties and football tailgates and on the Corner. Distance makes it difficult to get together in person, but they text all the time, Browning-Lynch says.
“When something happens in my life, she is often the first person I tell, and she is much more up to date on what really matters than neighbors I see every day. We were besties at UVA, and we remain besties today!”
Navigating life together
Susan Souren Bangs (Col class of ’89), Tania Chomiak-Salvi (Col class of ’89), Inbal Frank Vuletich (Col class of ’90) and Tina Arndt Bohse (Com class of ’90) met while living in the Smith portal of Brown College, then Monroe Hill. More than three decades later they still get together regularly via Zoom and almost annually in person.
“We have helped one another navigate all aspects of child-rearing, from the terrible 2’s to the college search,” Bangs writes. “We give and receive career advice. We have supported each other through terrible diagnoses and divorce. We have cheered for each other’s kids and spouses. We have traded and discussed too many books to count. We have shared amazing meals in restaurants and experienced beautiful hikes together. I could not imagine life without these friends, and I thank UVA for sending them into my life!”
Daily connection
“Julie Dumas (Col class of ’96) lived across the hall from me first year in Hancock,” shares Brenda Queen (Col class of ’96). “We became teammates on the women’s rowing team. We keep in touch almost daily via memes, Reels and texts. Here we are at our last regatta in college and at the 50th anniversary of women rowing celebration at UVA.”
Concord to Charlottesville
Francis Scott Conant (Col class of ’67) and Michael Holden (Col class of ’67) already knew each other when they arrived at UVA. Both graduated from the Middlesex School in Concord, Massachusetts. During their first year, they roomed in Bonnycastle (then Fitzhugh) together. They pledged different fraternities but roomed together again during their fourth year and have remained close friends for decades. “I fondly recall how often Mike has come to the aid of those in need, including me. His kindness, humor and candor are hallmarks of a Virginia gentleman.” Though they live states apart, Conant makes every effort to celebrate Holden’s birthday with him; they both turn 80 this year.
Ford Thunderbird
Dexter Oliver (Col class of ’70) and Jerry Epperson (Com class of ’70) were roommates all four years at UVA, thanks in part to family connections. The two were introduced by Oliver’s aunt, who lived in the town where Epperson was raised and knew his mother. Oliver then reached out to his cousins to get the scoop on his potential roommate. “With two thumbs up from my cousins, I agreed to consider the offer. So did Jerry, and he came to my house to visit, driving an early model Ford Thunderbird, which he informed me he would be allowed to take to UVA. This, of course, had NOTHING to do with my decision to request him as a roommate. We’ve been best friends ever since, even though the T-Bird was exchanged for an entry-level Ford sedan by our third year.”
Shared backgrounds
In the mid-1980s, Ricardo Padrón (Col class of ’89), Hernando Herrera (Col class of ’89) and Jenny Willier Murphy (Col class of ’89) were a few of the handful of Hispanic students at UVA. The three, all from Northern Virginia, knew one another before arriving. Padrón and Murphy had attended the same Catholic grade school and middle school together. And Herrera and Padrón attended the same high school.
On Grounds, they were leading busy lives. Padrón and Murphy were involved in University Guides, and Herrera was an RA who would eventually serve as co-chair of Residence Life. But they bonded, in part, because of their shared backgrounds. Murphy would sometimes mention the need to form a Latino student group. “And Hernando and I were like, ‘Well, with whom?’” Padrón remembers.
They didn’t form anything back then, but UVA’s Hispanic student population—and the groups that represent them—have grown. All three have been involved in the alumni La Bolívar Network—Herrera has served as its chairman and Murphy has served as its fundraising chair. And when the two are back in Charlottesville for a meeting, they meet up with Padrón for a meal.
Sweet harmonies
“I met my UVA besties as a member of the Virginia Women’s Chorus, and we’ve been friends for over 20 years now,” writes Katie Brackett (Col class of ’07). “We’ve traveled together, served as bridesmaids, welcomed babies, and celebrated countless birthdays over those years. We’ve since scattered around the country, but our group chat continues to be as lively, funny, and loving as it’s always been. I can’t imagine where I’d be without these ladies in my life.”
E-school bonds
Maya Chambers (Engr class of ’22), Roberto Bryan (Engr class of ’22) and Nile Alkebulan (Engr class of ’22) met as first-year engineering students and have stuck together ever since, Alkebulan shares. Chambers and Bryan even attended Alkebulan’s family holiday party in December. “We now work as engineers in Virginia, Maryland and North Carolina, but speak and visit each other regularly. I hope to be in their lives for many years to come!”
